Posted by: Judy | September 17, 2020

This Week in Beauty…

Proverbs 31:24 She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant.

She’s productive. She makes and sells and delivers on time.

What does that even mean to me? I’m what would be called unskilled. I have no trade skills, no professional skills, no financial skills. I’m a caregiver, jack of all trades.

I’ve always wanted to be like this woman. I considered being a chef and allowed my parents to convince me it was a stupid idea. I’ve thought about making jewelry but I’ve neither the patience or the creative gift. I’ve wanted to be a seamstress, but again, I lack the creative talent and the skill.

I confess that I didn’t pursue professional level skills because all I really wanted to be was a wife and mother. Such a calling requires being a jack of all trades, knowing something about everything. It kind of worked with my American Sign Language Interpreting. I struggled with the rules that violated my sense of rightness.

All in the past. Now what?

As a writer, I met my deadlines, mostly. No one is perfect.

As a caregiver, my dad is still pretty independent. I’m here, just in case. I’m often treated like I’m stupid and/or clueless. It’s a tough gig on my self-perception. My easy distractibility actually works because I’m able to check on my dad throughout the day without feeling interrupted and not feeling like I’m hovering, which he hates.

I’m not sure what to do about this one. Maybe I need to create a goal or gift that will help me focus or at least more intentionally seek God’s will.

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