Posted by: Judy | May 14, 2019

Unexpected insight…

I posted this on social media:

Blessed rain. I ran errands, safely, and enjoyed walking in the rain. I reminded myself that I could complain or I could dance. I didn’t exactly dance as I’m not comfortable drawing attention to myself. However, I smiled and turned my face toward heaven. Maybe I need to learn to dance, or maybe I need to learn to not worry about if anyone is watching.

The next day, I mulled the thought as I walked because it was raining. I still wasn’t dancing. No one was around. Yes, a car drove by every few minutes but that’s just an excuse. I assured myself I wasn’t afraid of people seeing me. Why didn’t I break into dance steps?

I’m afraid of dancing.

More specifically, I’m afraid of misstepping and doing serious damage again. How do I overcome this fear? It’s a perfectly reasonable fear. The damage has made dancing painful; ligaments don’t work the same anymore.

I did research on foods that will help strengthen the ligaments. I’m doing pretty good on eating foods every day that help.

Side note: Thirty years ago, I saw an orthopedist who told me that doing surgery at that time would be pointless. He advised that the next time I sprained my ankle I was to contact him on my way to the hospital. He would meet me there. His plan was to go in and scrape away all the scar tissue and start over. Funny note: The next time I sprained my ankle, I was in England. Needless to say, surgery didn’t happen. Years later, after my epidural experience, it turns out God was protecting me. At the time I saw the orthopedist, my problem with anesthesia was unknown. Thanks, God.

I did some dancing at singles’ dances but no longer really enjoy it. I miss doing stuff like swing, waltz, and electric slide. Swaying side to side with a stranger is… awkward, at least to me.

Maybe I need to consider something completely different, but still dancing, like belly dancing. I’ve taken a couple of classes, and I mean a couple as in two, two classes, two hours, each hour at a different time. I have a book, but I confess I become bored, quickly. I like watching it for a few minutes, but then I’m bored. To be honest, I’m pretty much that way with most dancing.

True confession: I could watch Mikhail Baryshnikov dance all day. He makes it look so effortless. Amazing. Michael Flatley has the same gift with his Irish dancing. Ice dancers Torvill and Dean gave awe-inspiring performances. Brian Boitano also made ice skating look effortless. Scott Hamilton is still my favorite ice skater; he was such an unlikely athlete. Awesome. Juliet Prowse was stunning. Gene Kelly in “Singin’ in the Rain” is an all-time ¬†favorite. Odd side note: I’ve never been a fan of Fred Astaire. Don’t know why.

Hmmm… I’m not averse to dancing… maybe I’m a dance snob. Or maybe I recognize that it isn’t among my gifts, and I’m willing to let it go. Some things to think about. Maybe I don’t need to dance in the rain; maybe laughing in the rain is enough.


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