Posted by: Judy | May 7, 2018

It’s coming…

…Mother’s Day. For some, the holiday that stresses them is Father’s Day. For others, it’s Siblings Day. For some, it’s all of those manufactured holidays.

I know, it’s kind of funny coming from me considering the fact that I have an entire series based on celebrating the holidays: Holiday, USA. I love the holidays, but they were miserable occasions in the world I grew up in.

With my primary abuser in a care facility, a great deal of abuse has ceased. Becoming a primary caregiver added a whole new batch of stress.

I thought I’d do better this year. The posts on social media have started, as well as the commercials. Yeah, I’m not handling it as well as I’d hoped. My eating is bad. My sleeping is unpredictable. It’s difficult to focus, i.e., stay on task, more than usual. My distraction is less like an easy game of tennis and more like a professional level game of pinball. My anxiety is climbing, regardless of the fact I’m safer than I’ve ever been before.

My mantra, “Give the battle to God and praise Him in the storm,” hasn’t been particularly helpful of late. It’s no less true, but I need something different to tackle this batch of troubles. I’m asking God to help me let go of resentment and bitterness and regrets. I’m also endeavoring to embrace a new perspective. All my life, I’ve prayed for deliverance. Mmm…yeah…that hasn’t gone well. The SEALs taught me “the only easy day was yesterday.” I’m working to incorporate into my thinking “Do not pray for easier lives. Pray for strength and courage to face whatever comes.”


Responses

  1. When my two children were small and I was walking ( with one in a stroller and one in a backpack) with a friend with two the same age as mine, we remarked that it was Mothers day and both of our husbands were off working and nothing was different than any other day. My friend said:” It’s just a Hallmark day really.” I’ve never forgotten that but it has helped me not to have expectations about the day. My daughter is now a mother and I will make sure to give her greetings on the day however.

    • 🙂


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