Posted by: Judy | November 2, 2016

A writing friend’s blog…

For those who are not aware, I have a wide variety of writing friends. Some of them, I would happily recommend their books. Others, not so much, but they’re awesome people. Some write clean Christian romance, some don’t.

Sharon Hamilton and I met online, first, and struck up a friendship. We later met at a local conference (local for me). She was struggling, as was I, wondering if she was on the right road. I’d read some of her books, and though they are steamier than my usual choice, I loved her characters. She discovered she could write SEAL romances and took off. I still love her characters. The stories are intense, and she doesn’t shy from the language or the physical intimacy. Some would probably say it’s my guilty pleasure. I simply enjoy her storytelling. There are spots I skim over, but I don’t lose the story by doing so.

Every Sunday, she shares a post her blog. This was her most recent:

http://sharonhamiltonauthor.blogspot.com/2016/10/fierce-on-page.html

She shares a few of the findings in a study of the difference between fear and anxiety.

I commented on her blog that I’m currently living in a state of anxiety. Life threw me a curveball, and though I haven’t dropped it, I’m struggling. I can’t even bring myself to talk about it but with a very few people, my sister and a dear friend. I emailed my last counselor, and he kindly reassured me I was “normal.”

At this time, I’m living life in blocks of hours rather than days.

My sister and my friend help me maintain my sanity, even as I worry about burdening them with my needs. I don’t want to be needy. The thought of falling into that pattern hikes my anxiety.

I’ve hit my highest weight, yet. Didn’t see that coming.

The avoidance game has expanded to more people. There are things I don’t want to hear as they heighten my anxiety. There are things I want to say but don’t want to burn bridges or hurt feelings or say something I’ll regret once the anxiety eases. I’m dancing a delicate waltz with current events and feeling awkward and clumsy.

I’m tired beyond words. I’m feeling a bit like this rose, burnt around the edges.

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Responses

  1. You will see light soon my dear🙏

    • Thank you. ❤ The reassurance is appreciated, more than I can say.

  2. Hugs.

    • {{{Judith}}}

  3. I’m sorry that you are dealing with such anxiety. I know that it can be crippling and I pray that it shifts soon.

    • Thank you, Marie. I know you understand, and your prayer is greatly appreciated. “This too shall pass.”


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