Posted by: Judy | February 24, 2016

Sharing my sister’s post…

My sister shared a poem from Warrior’s Landing, a FB page we both follow.

http://ptsd-acceptingcopingthriving.com/2016/02/23/getting-out-of-the-hole/

Spot on.

I’m feeling stressed. The first download didn’t work. I had to recheck formatting and spelling, etc, and try again. I think I have it figured out. One last check before attempting to download again, today.

The dog I “babysit” is going into the vet for surgery. Not my dog. Not my responsibility. I pray all goes well.

One of the feral cats is doing poorly. He has been laying in the same spot for several days. He’s still breathing. I don’t want to go near him because I know it will scare him. I’m praying for him, too.

NM is more than I can handle. She wants love. I get that. I can’t give her what she wants; no matter how much I give, it will never be enough for her. We don’t talk for days, and then she decides it’s time to tell me she loves me. Don’t tell me: Show me! Show me by respecting my boundaries, by treating me like an individual instead of extension of you and EF, wearing your hearing aids so I don’t have to yell at you to be heard. I’m angry and frustrated. Love doesn’t demand attention, violate boundaries, prefer lies to the truth. I was disappointed in myself for once again allowing myself to become angry — yes, anger is a warning a boundary has been violated — however, I promptly turned to God. Perhaps that’s the real difference. I’m learning to turn to God a lot faster instead of stewing. What do you know: I’m making progress.

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Responses

  1. I think it’s likely your mother isn’t capable of love except for her love of self. I’m sad for you that this is what you have to deal with

    • I don’t think she even loves herself. I have learned a lot. Yes, making lemonade, again. 😉 The book is in for review, so I’m a happy camper. 😀

  2. My sister and I were just having a conversation this morning about boundaries being violated, and unhealthy patterns being repeated. I’m going through something with my other sister, in that she’s looking to me for moral support and empathy right now, but it might end up being yet another case of “pretend crisis fabricated to suck up all my attention”. It’s hard trying to continue to be kind, but still honor your own boundaries. It’s can sometimes be difficult to know where to draw the line.

    Thanks for sharing the post today.

    • “pretend crisis fabricated to suck up all my attention” : That’s it exactly! Thanks for the clarification. You’re welcome. 🙂


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