Posted by: Judy | February 23, 2015

Plot Twist…

I wrote here about reading “The Ghost Keeper.” It was about accepting yourself, along with all your weird eccentricities.

Years ago, I asked God to stop the dreams. I was dreaming about my friends. They’d tell me what was happening in their lives, and I’d already know. The dreams didn’t come in a timely manner, offering me the opportunity to warn them. The details were often slightly off. All the dreams did was unsettle me. What purpose did they serve? None that I could discern So I asked God to stop them. He did.

Most of my dreams stopped.

A few years ago, when I was in counseling, I started having dreams about the “future.” I was happily married, with children. The problem was that my dog was also in those dreams. My dog had passed away already. I woke up crying, every single time. It was awful. My counselor kindly called them nightmares, stating that it was like a starving child dreaming of a feast and waking up to the knowledge they might die from hunger that day.

Again, I asked God to stop the dreams. I could ensure the dreams stopped through sleep deprivation.

After reading the book, I wondered if perhaps I needed to allow myself to embrace all of me, including my dreams. I told God He could send the dreams back. I have woken to dreams every single morning since. Some are scary. Some are weird. Some are peaceful. Some I know are me working out what is going on at the moment. Sleep deprivation does not help anymore. At this point, I’m endeavoring to accustom myself to having dreams as a part of my life again.

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Responses

  1. From how I understand it, dreams are our unconscious working out issues from our waking life. When people don’t dream, it does terrible things to your psyche. So, unpleasant as many dreams are (and I’d say 90 percent of mine are unsettling at best), they serve a greater purpose.

    Hugs. I know this one is hard for you.

    • Thanks for your input. It triggered a realization: I was struggling in my waking hours, and having the problems show up in my dreams, too, was like being trapped. I wanted sleep to be an escape, and it wasn’t. Now, I’m simply letting the dreams come. If I can make sense of it, great. If not, I’m learning to let it go. Cool. Hadn’t noticed that before. ((Judith))

  2. It sounds like this might have been a healthy choice for you to make, in that accepting the dreams, whatever they might bring, is opening the door to removing the mental block associated with them. You might even find yourself surprised once or twice by what reveals itself through your dreams.

    I especially like what you said in your comment, above. If you can make sense of it, great, and if not, you just let it go. We try so hard to make things fit some sense of order, and still, life reminds us that sometimes we have to be willing to accept that the order is not known to us at all, and finding a way to accept that as truth sounds like a step forward. Good luck, and I hope this change finds you eventually reaching a place where sleep is a welcome thing again, and you find restorative and peaceful silences in your dreams.

    • Thanks, ntexas99.


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