Posted by: Judy | December 10, 2014

Little things…

Emerging from Broken posted this on FB:

It is not just the blatant suggestions that cause the belief system to form full of lies, but phrases carelessly thrown out to a child by an adult also serve as the glue that supports all the self blame. Statements such as “you asked for it” “if you were more like “someone else”, “if you were not so loud, or so quiet” “you get on my nerves” … the list is too long to even go farther, but these lies and beliefs intertwined together with all manner of indications that I myself, attracted certain situations, sometimes mixed with “just enough truth” that I was too confused to think straight. All this created the lasting cement that was the foundation of my belief system. Darlene Ouimet (from my next book)

It is the little things I so often forget.

I frequently complain about the “last straw.” I’m able to handle so much, especially when it comes to the big things. I kick into survival mode, and go!

It’s the little belittling comments, the tiny boundary violations, day in and day out, the asides, the unpleasant little smile…

Interestingly enough, it’s the little things I do for others and people do for me that turn my day around for the better.

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Responses

  1. I forget too that it is such phrases that trigger me into survival mode. So true, there is power in how we use words, a smile, a kind words can make it a better day.

    • ((TR))

  2. I call those things the swarms of mosquitoes. One is no big deal but attacked at every part of your body by little bitey bugs…..yea it is a big deal.

    • ((Ruth))

  3. It really is those little things that dig under your skin and fester. It’s also why it’s harder for outsiders to see and easier for the abuser to get away with it.

    And, ugh, the schadenfreude smile. It gives me nightmares.

    • Exactly!


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