Posted by: Judy | July 9, 2014

Not sure what to think…

Considering what I’ve been writing about and thinking about it was… odd to catch a re-run of Law and Order, SVU. The story revolved around a borderline personality disorder mother who controlled every aspect of her sons’ lives.

Some things weren’t the same. Some things were.

Since I don’t believe in coincidences, only Godincidents, incidents in which God chooses to remain anonymous, I must search within myself for the message. I don’t usually turn the television on Monday nights. The weather was unsettled, so I turned it on to catch the news. One of my favorite MASH episodes was on afterward, so I watched it. Then a couple of my favorite cooking shows were on. I did a little channel surfing in betwixt and between. I caught the commercial about child abuse. I don’t usually watch L&O. I was still surfing when it came on. A little boy was caught eating chicken from a garbage can. He begged the police not to tell his mother he’d been eating. I stopped and watched the entire episode.

It touched on painful memories.

God didn’t finish there. After L&O, I channel surfed a little more and found Equitrekking, a half hour of horses. This one visited the Morgan Farm and Icelandic Pony Farm, both in Vermont. Made me smile. Reminded me of things I love even as I deal with the wounds and scars of my world.


  1. Those are a lot of Godincidents in one night. A comment (can’t remember whom) about how a lot of TV shows are about dysfunctionality underneath made me think of how writers/creators for these shows are telling a very real story. Great Godincident that you landed on something you love. šŸ™‚

    • Yes, I noticed that about television. I also take note of the ones who’ve learned to deal with it in a healthy manner (very few) and those who simply put a twist on it.

  2. There are a lot of L&O svu episodes that have shades of my mother in them. I was also re watching an episode of Ray Donovan that has a child molesting priest, and the way the priest refuses to apologize or take accountability for his actions makes me want to run around the room screaming. The first time I watched it was with my husband and a friend, and I was squirming in my seat and muttering explicatives. But sometimes it’s good to recognize these bad people and feel protective of the characters that they hurt because it helps me gain more empathy for myself.

    • Funny how I hadn’t thought of gaining more empathy for myself. I’m able to see what was so incredibly wrong in the show, but explain it away in my life. Thanks for the observation.

  3. I’ve relied on the escapism and reflections and insights from watching television programs and movies for a very long while, in that it helps me step outside of my current situation, and allows for observation. We can get so tightly wound in just trying to survive our circumstances, that we forget to step back and see the bigger picture. Television is one method for helping us do just that — it seems we’re much more capable at seeing the bigger picture when we’re observing, rather than when we’re totally consumed by just getting through another day.

    That’s one of the things I’m struggling with right now. Financially, I can no longer afford to pay for cable television (and have explored various ways of obtaining free or less expensive versions through the computer), but I’m also considering that I may have to let go of my internet connection as well. The questions I’m asking are whether the extra money that will buy me a little bit more wiggle room in the budget each month will offset the loss of escapism and insight afforded by television (and movies). There is something to be said for having the ability to disappear into a program for even a little while, whether it be one that offers insight, or one that offers enjoyment and relief.

    Glad to hear you found your own string of Godincidents yesterday, and even though it may have you wondering at what to take away from the experience, if it gave you something to think about, then it sounds like it was time well spent. A change of scenery, in whatever way is available, is a welcome thing.

    • I think that with television it also helps that only a tiny portion of the picture is revealed. They put a single aspect under the microscope.

      My counselor accused me of treating my life like a pizza, glomming everything together. I did. I lived my life all at once. How was I supposed to single out a single thing? Television does it.

      I have rabbit ears television. My friends in Cali can’t afford cable and don’t have access to an antenna. They watch DVDs. Their internet isn’t reliable enough to stream on their computer. They aren’t current on pop culture, but we never spent much time at either house anyway. We were going to free parks and the beach. I miss my trips to Cali.

      The serial Godincidents were a much need breath of fresh air.

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