Posted by: Judy | October 2, 2012

Short rant…

Input please:

I recently went through an interesting go around. I shared with with NM and EF. I thought, what could it hurt? I’m simply relaying information. A bit of fun with working through a difficult situation.

Just when you think it’s safe to go back in the water:

I really hate when the NM asks, “What did you learn?”

Why does it feel condescending?

Okay, so she uses that superior face. You know the one. No matter what you answer it isn’t going to be the answer she was looking for.


I hate when she asks me questions.


  1. If it feels condescending is because it is. It is probably hard to pin point because it’s not the question itself but everything around it and behind it. For instance, if any of us asked you the same question you’d know that we want to hear what you share so that we can learn too. But I get the impression that is not the case with your NM, to me it sounds like she’s talking to you as if you were still a child. Which is an inappropriate thing to do to a grown up. It must be really irritating. (((Judy)))

    • Oh. You’re right, Kara. You would really want to know instead of trying to make sure I learned something. That makes so much more sense. Thanks ((Kara))

  2. I know from past experience that she uses ‘teacher mode’ for that question. I wonder how she would react if you replied, “I learned not to share my experiences with you.” I would have said, “Bummer I am sorry that happened to you.” “Wow, I understand what that feels like.” “Would you like a hug?” Her comment put you down at the level of student that must be shown the way and be taught. I know from experience that you do not need, “What did you learn?” pointed out to you. You absorb experiences and learn from them constantly. Sad thing is, I suspect, she was trying to show concern. Even sadder, she did it in a way that kept you distant and unconnected. See you later today. Hugs.

    • ((Ruth)) Thanks!

  3. I know that superior look only too well and I have experienced the implied insult behind the question so many times. It used to make my skin prickle and my hair stand on end.
    I feel for you ((Judy)) it is absolutely infuriating.
    Molly x

    • Thanks ((Molly))

  4. {{{{{{Judy}}}}}}

    • ((((((vicariousrising))))))

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