Posted by: Judy | May 30, 2012

The Story Continues…

Though my dog and my horse had wrought changes in my life, I still lived on the surface. By this time, I’d been through two counselors, both of whom never heard about a lot of things. I didn’t see the point of bringing up stuff that was all my fault. I couldn’t bear the thought of having any more blame laid at my feet. The burden was already so heavy.

I became a transcriptionist, in the late 90s. I was terrified by the internet. I had purchased my big, fat, red Dorland’s medical dictionary and the current prescription drug book. However, after calling the Reference Desk at the library — for the third time in less than a week, because my drug book didn’t have what I was looking for — I had to re-evaluate. Each time, I asked them where they’d found the information. Each time, they told me, “The internet.”

The internet was dial-up and free. I only used it for work researh. Nothing else. Ever.

Then a major marker: 9/11. I felt connected to the world in a way I never had before. I’d lived in Thailand and Europe, but never had I felt the world was so small as I did on that day. I mourned with millions. I knew it changed everything.

A decision was handed to me: Do I continue to live the way I always had or did I make a different choice?

I wanted to make a different choice, but I had no idea what or how.

The turning point: December 2001 and seeing The Fellowship of the Ring.

My world exploded, but in a way I had never imagined.


  1. 9/11 was a game changer for a lot of people. It totally altered my way of looking at the world and myself.

    • Yep. I think part of the reason I reiterate it is because I know people who weren’t changed by it at all.

  2. “Living on the surface”, what a good way to put it. I look forward to the next post.

    • Thanks for being willing to share the journey, Kara.

      • I am so grateful to you and Ruth for sharing your story and for your support. I am learning so much from you both and feeling so much happier.
        I had lived with terrorism growing up in Spain, so when 9/11 happened, it was more than I could take. I just wanted to hide from the world. It was only last year that I was able to fly on my own again. I am indebted to you both for helping me get out of the “cave”.

        • You’re most welcome. It’s an honor to be a part of your journey. My sister and I both know how important it is to stand together with someone who understands and believes. Go you!

          • 🙂

            • Glad I could help too. Glad to her you are moving out of your “cave” dwelling. 🙂

  3. We have way too much in common, lady 🙂 Great post.

    • 😀

  4. […] sparked a moment of rememberance (if it’s not a word, it most definitely SHOULD be! lol) She and I have a lot of things in common. Not in the “we both like peanut butter” kind […]

  5. I can’t wait to hear what’s next!

    • Word of warning: I’m taking a bit of a break, so to speak. I’ll be posting links to other blogs on Thursday and Friday, my weekend stuff, and then I’ll be back at it on Monday. With the Reader Event this weekend, I’m distracted.

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