Posted by: Judy | January 31, 2012

Half way through…

I admit it: January and February are the most difficult times of the year for me, for numerous reasons.

I survived the holidays without going ballistic. A great achievement, but difficult to consider praiseworthy or even worth celebrating, since the implication is a bit dark in nature.

Finances are driven home. A nice way of saying I have to gather my tax stuff together and prepare to see my accountant. Never a happy occasion, even though I do like my accountant, who’s a very nice person.

The longest, most tortuous month is before me. February. As much as a struggle as the holidays are, Valentine’s Day is the toughest day on the planet, especially for someone who is single. The choice isn’t because I wouldn’t like to be in a relationship but because I’m not healthy enough to sustain a relationship. I’m much better about making and maintaining boundaries, but the man/woman kind was the first one violated, and the most difficult for me to understand still. And if that isn’t enough to discourage me, when would I have time now?

So, here’s to being half way through. Only 29 more days to go. Great. An extra day this year. March will see things start to improve. I don’t know why. I only know January and February are my toughest months of the year. I’ve stopped fighting it, and try to prepare as best I’m able.

Breathe in. Breathe out. There is no going around. There is only through. Blessedly, I have a circle of awesome friends who will help me. Thank God.


Responses

  1. Chocolate Festival is a great way to make it more fun. đŸ™‚

    • I’m looking forward to it!

  2. Sometimes getting to that place where we recognize, “There is no going around. There is only through.” is what helps us stay tethered to the world. For me, it is always December and January, (and later, October, and June, in that order). I’m sorry for you that February still looms ahead on the calendar, and that it holds challenges for you, but I appreciate your willingness to recognize that getting through it will offer some relief. At least in knowing this, we can mark off the days, one by one, and keep moving forward. Hang in there, and don’t forget to allow for a bit of chocolate.

    My particular weakness are the Cadbury baby eggs. Every year I say I absolutely positively WILL NOT, and then I do anyway. In moderation?

    • LOL!! Dove Dark Chocolate Promises are my favorite. I actually do better with my eating if I allow myself those little treats.

      I’m endeavoring to create a better February, this year, starting with the Chocolate Festival. The end of the month will have a trip to the Ren Faire, with Valentine’s Day sandwiched. Hmmm… maybe I’ll plan some other fun stuff…

  3. I can completely relate to dreading certain months. Although December is hard (too much Christmas angst), the months I dread are June – September, because of where I live. The heat and humidity are physically punishing to me, even if I am only out in it for a few minutes. I just dread them. May is not much better…

    Praying that February will pass quickly for you. I can understand your reasons.
    Hugs and prayers,
    M

    • Thanks ((Mary))


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