Posted by: Judy | December 28, 2011

Eating issues…

You know you’ve had too many sweets when your body is craving protein and veggies.

Yesterday, my sister, a professional photographer, took me out for a photo session, as a photo is needed for my author bio. It was stressful for me. It was cold. It’s exciting. By the end of the day, we had chosen the picture to use, and she had worked her magic.

It didn’t have a smooth start. When my parents asked what she was doing that day, she told them she was taking pictures of her sister. My father turned to me and asked me what I was doing for the day. I stared. Blinked, and replied that my sister only has one sister, and that’s me. My father turned back to my sister and asked, “Why would you want to do that?” As if my sister were crazy. I don’t think my father realized how close he came to being smacked.

My parents, who have said some pretty nasty things about my weight and my appearance, sabotage me on a regular basis. Case in point, my mother made cookies, and gave me a container of them. I couldn’t bring myself to throw them away. I ate them, in less than two days, until there were only two left. I wanted to throw them away, but couldn’t. My final solution was to break them apart and eat the chocolate chips and throw the rest away. My compromise.

I know I have severe eating issues. I remember a little about my childhood, not a lot. I remember being on the BRAT diet, Bananas, Rice, Applesauce, and Toast. I remember eating dog food because I was hungry. Both those memories were reenforced by my mother telling the stories at family events, to friends, and total strangers. My sister remembers how sick I was as a little girl. It required that I stay close to my mother, no matter what was going on. I remember when I started lying about being sick, so I wouldn’t be put back on the diet. And I kept right on lying.

As a side note, funnily enough, I’m able to control my portions of the pies, cake, and cookies I bought for the holiday.


Responses

  1. Interesting how it is food from the mother that causes the problems. I was very proud when I refused to take the cookies home. As we learn, we can readjust our behavior. I really loved doing your picture yesterday. 🙂

    • Thanks, again ((Ruth))


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